Let’s stop excusing ourselves for being badass

This is a bit of a Chihuahua of a blog, aka relatively small in stature but loud as fuck with a message it’s trying to shout at top volume for the entire world to hear. So instead of a long winded, jazzy old introductory paragraph, I’m just going to come out with it.


And we need to bloody well stop it this very moment, in fact fuck it, we should have stopped it last year. Actually bollocks to that, we should never have started doing it in the first place. This is in no way a criticism of us pole dancers, but instead a big fat “fuck you” to societal conventions which make us feel the need to apologise for existing. What I am on about, that I have been very very guilty of doing in the past, is posting a picture of oneself in an awesome pole trick, or in some lush new pole wear and captioning the photo with “Excuse the belly rolls but yay I got my Gemini!” or “Apologies for the no make up selfie but how cute is my new pole set?” or feeling the need to apologies for something in the photo that society has deemed to be an “imperfection.” Well imperfection my proudly cellulite ridden arse!

I have seen incredible pole dancers on Insta (again, very much me included) apologise for having rolls (which we all have), not having any make up on, being too pale, having cellulite etc, which is all shit we shouldn’t apologise for because it’s part of being a natural fucking human being. So what if you post a photo with no make up on and a few tummy rolls? It’s not like you have posted a photo curling out a massive shit in your elderly neighbours birdbath. Yes I enjoy running around with a full face on and my hair freshly dyed and straightened but fuck me if I worked it out I think that’s only what I actually look like ten percent of the time, and you know what? I’m perfectly cool with that. The older I get, the more comfortable I am with my bodies imperfections and raw self, so from this day forward I am going to endeavour to post more unfiltered pole photos and practice what I preach.

Most importantly though, whenever you go to apologise for something about yourself when posting a photo in a new pole move, stop and remember exactly why you’re posting it…because you have achieved something incredible! I say this so often (especially when training Shoulder Mounts) that my pole sister Dannis lovingly takes the piss out of me for busting out my catchphrase so I’m putting it in writing, pole isn’t easy! It’s a painful bloody art form which requires flexibility, strength and a shitload of perseverance to master moves – flexibility, strength and shitload of perseverance that your body has only gone and bloody required! Your amazing body is learning to accomplish some pretty fucking sweet things, regardless of what it possesses that is deemed an “imperfection” by society. Who even wants to look perfect anyway?

I know learning to develop confidence in your body and a body positive attitude is very much a journey not a destination, and a long old journey at that, but it’s very much one worth embarking upon as I am beginning to learn. Tiff Finney, Kitty Velour and Lauren Red have some fabulous posts on their Instagrams that I recommend reading as you begin the path to body confidence. Ultimately, you don’t need to look and be a certain body type to enjoy pole (and life for that matter) and smash it. So get out there, conquer your pole goals, appreciate your amazing body for what it has achieved and make no apologies for it!

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