It’s no secret that I fucking LOVE dancing in heels. I mean, it’s weird because outside of the pole studio I am firmly a trainers and Vans kinda lass, but stick me in the studio and my inner hoe is dramatically unleashed in the form of teeny polewear and massive shoes. I love how confident they make you feel, how long they make your legs look, all the styles be they boots, shoes or those rather badass looking heel-less platform creations, I just love how chucking on a pair of heels transforms your dancing.
My relationship with heels over the years has been a pretty typical one. I began my journey with a modest pair of Adore seven inch Pleasers in red chrome, which once I discovered how comfy they were got absolutely battered to shit and became my practice pair. Obviously I wasn’t content with just one pair of shoes, and soon my collection had evolved into two pairs of shoes and the classic pair of patent boots, all at a sensible seven inches high.
Now, for a while I had been gawping in awe at my pole buddies who had a pair of hench, eight inch bad boys quite enviously. To my little baby pole dancer eyes they look gigantic, was I brave enough to buy my own pair? Of course I fucking was. I toyed with seven and a half inch Pleasers for about three months before buying my first pair of eights, getting my beloved buggers customised and never turning back. So long sevens, I’m a big girl now!
My long and loving relationship with eight inch Pleasers continued for three more years, until one day during pole practice my homie Patricia gave me her nine inch boots to try one. Bloody hells bells they were sexy. I had never worn nines before, but not one to shy away from a challenge, I zipped up the bastards and gave them a whirl around and up the pole.
They were ace! They really didn’t feel too much more strenuous than eights but made my legs look at least three feet longer. I hadn’t treated myself to a new pair of shoes for well over a year by this point, so the thought of grabbing the bull by the horns and getting a new pair was fucking tempting.
However, whilst shopping online for some big ass boots, I naturally stumbled across the gargantuan ten inch bad boys, which I believe are the highest pole shoes you can get (feel free to correct me if I’ve got that completely wrong). Instantly thoughts of adding them to my Christmas list started whiring around in my mind. Before you wonder why I didn’t just treat myself to a pair, I’m a lowly NHS Administrator by day, who legit does not have £120 laying around to spend on boots, so it was time for Father Christmas and co to get their act together and treat me after I had been a solid good egg for the past year. Anyway, enough digressing. I had tried nines on and could dance in them fine, so why not just go big and get the fucking tens? They look incredible when dancing in and my goal for quite some time has been to massively up my strength game, so why not do it in style with a pair of boots that weigh a beastly kilo each?!Why the fuck not indeed.
Now, thankfully old Father Christmas and his mates did indeed get their act together and I was chuffed to bits to open a box with a pair of magnificent ten inch Pleasers on Christmas day! OH HELL YES. To say I was barry buzzing was an understatment. I quickly tried them on (they looked most sexy teamed with my fleecey Game of Thrones pyjamas) and set about strutting around my parents house, nearly giving my mother a heart attack thinking I was going to tumble to my doom (or break my ankle at the very least) and my father a complex as I was a whole four inches taller than him in them. I was very much living my amazonian goddess fantasy in these boots of glory and almost wanted the festive season to hurry the fuck up so I could get back into the studio and try them out properly.
Two week’s ago the time had come for my very first pole practice of 2020 and I could not wait. I whizzed off up to the studio, with my gigantic boot box, ready to give the bastards a whirl in all their glory.
Oh shit these boots are H E A V Y.
I found tens a hell of lot more difficult to dance and move in in general than eights and nines. Their sheer density meant that shoulder mounting in them for now is an impossible task, and I can just about chopper invert and aerial invert if I really concentrate hard enough and throw all my might into it. Mark my words these are not boots to be underestimated and fuck me it honestly feels like they wear you. They’re hefty, fear inducing and in all honestly learning to walk in them properly is going to take me a fair amount of practice. Maybe I could do a few laps of the studio in them as part of my warm up to develop some sort of grace and poise in the boots, as opposed to the sexy, lopsided giraffe vibes I’m currently giving off in them.
As per usual, I have definitely bitten off more than I can chew when it came to learning to dance in ten inch boots, but as previously mentioned I am not one to shy away from a challenge. I have spent years oogling at queens like Tiff Finney and Lauren Elise King who make dancing in ten inch heels look like a walk in the park, so if I get even half as queenly as those two, I will be a very happy little pole dancer! I am determined to keep drilling and drilling my aerial inverts, shoulder mounts and tricks in them until they’re smooth as fuck. Just imagine (if I up my stretching game and keep strength training in the giant boots) how sick a fucking flat jade would in them with extra long lines, or an extended butterfly? Now if that isn’t training motivation then I don’t know what is.
For anyone who is thinking about taking the plunge and getting ten inch bad boys, proceed with caution and if you’re relatively new to dancing in heels for fucks sake don’t get them unless you want to be terrified to your very core. Start of with six or seven inchers and work you way up until that height is comfortable. Like I said I had been fully accustomed to eights for ages before (quite literally) taking it to new heights and joining shoes that come with a warning gang (seriously they actually do)!
Do you have any tips or experince of dancing in massive heels, if so please drop them in the comments!