If I was to best describe my own, personal pole dance style, I’d say it could probably be summarised nicely as “daydreamer.” Fuck me if I had a quid for every time I daydreamed about badass tricks and routines I had conjured up (few of which I can actually do) I could have retired at 27. Like clockwork every morning on the bus to work you can find me sat at the back, applying my make up (I am 10/10 a lass who would rather have an extra 20 minutes in bed than properly apply their make-up in the morning) and working my way through many Spotify playlists and imagining myself performing/competing to some absolute bangers.
Said imagining happening on a pretty regular basis (at least daily) has resulted in my motivation to get my arse into gear and compete increasing dramatically. 2019 is a pretty damn busy year for me as I’m getting married in October. So in the spirit of self-care and not overloading myself like I did in 2018, which left me feeling a the poor bastard horse in Buckaroo on several occasions, I have decided this year to focus on the wedding and developing my pole skills before I jump back onto the competition wagon. If I have learnt one thing in my nearly 29 years on the planet, is that it’s best not to roll yourself too thin and half arsed attempt several things, it is instead far better to put your whole arse into one thing. Therefore this year I shall be building my strength, skill base and flexibility up to some mighty fucking levels (here’s hoping at least) ready to launch myself firmly into the competition zone in 2020.
In my years spent watching several of my pole besties absolutely smash it at a variety of both national and regional competitions, I have built up an ever growing bucket list of pole competitions that I am determined to compete in one day and make the finals. Enough of my waffle, here is the list!
1. Dance Filthy
Butter my arse I absolutely ADORE this competition. Seriously I don’t think there’s anything about it that I don’t love. The sheer amount of shoe bangs, floor fucking and drop splits in this competition take years off my life and quite simply reduce me to a wide eyed, inspired, energised and gawping puddle of a woman by the end of the night. All the competitors always look fierce beyond belief and bring whole new levels of both sass and creativity to the stage – all in their hench Pleasers too. It’s no secret that Exotic, Classique and Stripper style are my favourite styles of pole dance, so competing in a competition dedicated to those styles would mean I could die happy.
2. Pole Theatre
I think everyone in the Pole world deep down has dreams about competing in this legendary competition – I know I do! Whenever I spectate at Pole Theatre I always leave feeling hugely entertained at the very least, but what appeals to me most about Pole Theatre is the huge freedom it gives their competitors to express themselves and their vision fully. I am definitely a creative person at heart, so the thought of telling a story through pole dance with all manner of props, sound effects and that funky, big screen thing at the back don’t half make my titties tingle. Pole Theatre UK is also fabulous because it consists of four categories – Pole Art, Pole Comedy, Pole Drama and Classique, so if I felt like taking a monumental leap out of my comfort zone and having a stab at a style that wasn’t my usual (attempt at) Classique pole, I could give it a solid go!
3. The Authentic Pole Dance
This one, a bit like Dance Filthy, does exactly what it says on the tin. The Authentic Pole Dance is a competition for pole dancers who are fans of the the authentic, strip club based style of pole dance, which is obviously right up my alley in every way shape and form. Both developing and honing my style of exotic pole is pretty much my top overall priority in my pole adventure at the moment, so the Authentics is firmly on my bucket list to enter. An added bonus with the Authentics is that there is no video entry-you go straight to the regional heats! As shit your pants scary as that would be, it would be a fab opportunity to get to perform live in front of a panel of judges, even if you didn’t necessarily get through.
4. The Bristol Pole Championships
How can I not have my awesome cities very own pole competition on the list?! I have entered the last three Bristol Pole Championships and not made the finals yet, however I have crept closer and closer each time, so watch out Bristol Pole Championships 2020, Foxen is coming for you!
One of the main reasons I would love to make the finals at the Bristol Pole Championships is because I have seen this competition go from strength to strength and the catergories’ standard get higher and higher every time. To actually make it to the final of Bristol Pole Champs would be a massive fucking confidence boost for me, and who doesn’t love having one of those once in a while? Besides, entering a comp like this would be a huge motivator for me to get my ass in the studio and train, as every competition should be, and there’s bugger all wrong with that.
Last but by no means least on my competition bucket list is the sexy tour de force that is Floorplay. Entering Floorplay would a be another huge, mammoth-sized leap out of my comfort zone, but it’s one that I would love to be able to take at some point during my pole adventure. The reason why Floorplay would be such a big jump for me is because I’m much more of a tricks combo orientated pole dancer than I am a floor queen. I fucking adore floor work, but due to my shitey levels of flexibility, the best I can muster up on the floor work front are some clock legs, fan roll things and twerking- which if I’m going to be honest does knock my confidence a tad. However, with all the flexibility training I have planned for 2019, by 2020 I shall be cartwheeling and drop splitting my way into Floorplay baby!
Well there you have it, my pole competition bucket list! What competitions are you desperate to enter? Let me know in the comments!