Your girl finally fucking did it. After at least three solid years of stress, anguish and pure infuriation, I have finally conquered one of my major nemesis moves – the Sneaky Bastard V!
Those of you who have been following Chrome Chronicles for a while now will remember that I detested this move so much that I wrote an entire blog post dedicated to my hatred for it. Honestly every time we attempted the Sneaky V in class (which was a hell of a lot as it’s one of my instructor Eloise’s go-to moves) I would grimace, and quiet often let out a sly “fucks sake” knowing that I was going to have to either face my nemesis square in its face or come up with an alternative to it. Thankfully, my many bitch fits about the Sneaky V didn’t bother Eloise at all, as not only does she have cracking banter, but because we have known each other for years she has no issue pushing me out of my comfort zone and calling me out on my nonsense. In fact, it was Eloise calling me out on my bullshit that gave me the kick up the arse I needed to finally conquer the elusive Sneaky V.
My main struggle when it came to mastering the Sneaky V was getting the balance point right. I could do Ayeshas and Straightedges confidently before I could V, and it was all because I felt about as sturdy as my bowels after 3 coffees when attempting the shape. Throughout my pole journey, I have struggled with moves which involve being on the side of the pole (such as Genies, side climbs and obviously the Sneaky V) as opposed to moves which are vertically up the pole (Geminis, Butterflies and Flatlines) it if that makes sense. I just never felt fully secure in side on moves, quite the opposite in fact, as I was convinced I would come crashing out of them at top speed.
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Anyway, throw it back to about a month ago and once again I was confronted with the bloody Sneaky V, this time entering it from a Genie – a double dose of side on doom. As per usual I let out a “ah fucks sake”, but with a grim determination to not let the bastard defeat me, I cracked on with the move. After a few failed attempts with a spot, I explained that I was convinced I would fall when I took my top leg off and plummet to the bottom of the pole. It was at this moment that Eloise gave me some sound advice which changed the game.
“Eilish, if you don’t fall out of your Ayesha then why are you going to fall out of a Sneaky V?”
I mean to be quite honest fuck knows why I hadn’t realised this sooner, but there’s a lot out there it takes my wee brain a while to realise. Once I had realised that there was no solid truth behind the thought that I was going to fall off, I bravely got into position, removed my top leg from the pole and achieved my first of many Sneaky fucking Vs.
As those of you who have done the move will know, once you’re in it it’s nowhere near as scary or wobbly as you think it may be and it’s relatively easy to secure that sweet, balancing spot. It’s a pretty pain free move in my opinion, and I’m not quite sure how I ended up building it up to be such an unconquerable mountain in my head. Since mastering the move I have manage to get into it via not one but two different entries – I’ll end up a damn pro at this rate!
As I’ve been writing this blog I’ve realised that this little anecdote has a moral to the story. Don’t allow things to become scarier in your head than they actually are, as when you put on your brave girl pants and face them they’re never as bad as you build them up to be. If you’ve made it this far, I hope this blog helps you to conquer your nemesis pole move (or anything else in life for that matter), especially if it’s the Sneaky V!
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